Torah Shiur -- The Power of Speech

We know that the Torah is very exacting in regards to Loshon Horah: there are 17 negative and 14 positive commandments concerning disparaging speech. In fact, the Rambam paskens like the Gemara, that the sin of Loshon Horah is worse than the sins of Idol worship; illicit relations, and bloodshed. The question is why? Of all of our activities why does the Torah see fit that this one should be dealt with so severely? What is so egregious, so horrific? After all its only words.. ..
This Shmuz deals with the Torah's view of the power of the spoken word, and its effect on human relationships.

Listen to this Shmuz Limudei Torah!

Learn Torah Onlie--The Potential & The Present

"Considering where I come from and what I've been through, I'm doing pretty well..."

While this may be a comforting position to take, the question a person must ask themselves is: is this really all that I can be? What if I were to stop making excuses? What if I was to truly hold myself accountable to live up to my potential? What if I was to go full blast - how great could I be?

This question is essential for growth, but it is also one of our greatest pitfalls. If we don't clearly see how much we are capable of, we cannot chart the course toward our potential. However, with a realistic view of where we are now and a clear understanding of what we could become might lead to depression.

This Shmuz focuses us on maintaining a balance between the two views needed for steady growth: a clear understanding of where we are now and a vivid image of what we can be, even if we won't reach those levels for many, many years.

Listen TO Shmuz #138 Here, then come back to comment!

Study Torah --- Being Sensitive

Almost all of the people that we deal with are reasonable, well intentioned individuals. And so too, am I. Yet, in the course of life, there is conflict, hurtful words, vengeful acts. And, in that rare moment of self honesty, I realize that everything that happens isn't the "other guys fault". I too, am to blame. There have been situations where I acted in a manner that was cold and callous. There have been times when I acted with cruelty and malice. The question is why? It's not that I am not a nice guy, I know I am. Yet there are times when that's not the way I act. The question is why would a nice, caring individual act in a manner very inconsistent with that image? And more significantly what can I do about it?

This Shmuz focuses us on one of the keys to growing in all human relationships: learning to focus on the Inner Condition – how people actually feel, and learning to ignore the Outer Condition – the show that people put on to hide what is actually going on in their heart.

Listen To Shmuz #137 Here, then come back to comment!

I'm Never Wrong -- Shiur Torah

There is much truth in the adage: There are three sides to every story, your side, my side and the truth. And, even though I fully understand that you might be making a valid point, as soon as we get into an argument, I can no longer even see your side because, of course, I'm right.

Why is that? We all make mistakes. That is part of being human. And while I certainly can accept that you make mistakes, it becomes very difficult to accept that I may be wrong. In theory I accept that as a human I err, but when it comes down to real life situations, I just seem never to be wrong.

This Shmuz focuses on why it is that we humans have a blind spot when it comes to seeing our own faults, and helps us with some techniques to change that natural propensity.

Listen To Shmuz #136 Here, then come back to comment!

Torah Online --- Imagination: The Devil's Playground

Eleanor Roosevelt has been credited with saying, "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." The reality is that most of the battles that we fight are based on complex constructions -- created by us. Whether they be issues of misunderstanding other's motives, or our fight with passions and desire, or understanding our place in the universe - our fights and battles are very real to us.

Yet, when you try to explain them to others we often find, many people can't even identify with the challenge nor understand the temptation.

This Shmuz focuses on the fight of our generation, and the very powerful psychological forces that help create the fever- pitched battle that it is.

Listen To Shmuz #135 Here, then come back to comment!

PURIM: Being Human--The Torah

One of the most difficult character traits to work on is humility. Not only is it considered the most pervasive of the all of the middos, it is the most misunderstood. On one hand, we are obligated to appreciate the greatness of the human, yet on the other, we must remain humble.

One technique to help identify the trait and its pathology is to see it in its extreme. Using the story of Megillas Esther as a backdrop, and particularly some of foibles of Haman, we are able to witness arrogance in its extreme, and thereby find its cure: the understanding that I am a human.

This is a highly recommended Shmuz for working on the trait of humility, as well as a good preparation for Purim.

Listen To Shmuz #132 Here and come back to comment!